Friday, May 07, 2004

haiz.. been experiencing many emotions within a short span of a few days.. no wonder i'm so tired.. heh.. in my heart i really wish for many things.. like.. i dunno.. specific direction in my life? hehz
i've felt hurt, angry, excited, disappointed, fear, hope.. so many different kinds of emotions.. fear when i thought i lost 100 bucks during the school fees collection.. excitement when i got accepted into NUS.. indecisiveness when i couldn't and still cannot decide between the two courses which i'm offered.. frustration when i found i couldn't talk to anyone my age.. no one's really interested in giving me advice.. most are just interested in my final decision.. and the worse thing is.. jotham is away on exercise!!! argh!!!
yeah.. i guess it made me think of the lack of this support group or even a close group of friends that i really long to have.. and it made me feel real sad.. i found that there was no one i could talk to.. or actually wanted to talk to.. no one i could confide in especially since he was away.. no one i could share my fears and hopes with.. no one to give me advice on where i should go... haiz.. oh well.. anyway my sec4 girls! i'm not saying i can't share with u, but yeah.. really need some peers or older ones to give me advice on where to go and stuff.. yupyup!
and yeah! i guess i should also thank God for my sec4 gals! heh.. who i'm able to share with.. just not as much recently cos of their exams!
talking abt my mentoring group.. i've been thinking abt splitting them into two.. and doing the same thing that the j2 gals are doing.. cos the group is getting kinda big and it's really hard to us to share deeply in such a biiiiiiiiig group.. still thinking.. and haven't been praying but i should get down to doing so!! yupyup
two weeks left to working in the kindergarten.. these two months have passed by so fast.. i'm really really gonna miss these kids.. though they raise my blood pressure level at times and cause me huge amounts of stress, i'm just gonna miss every single one of them.. of course some more than others.. especially those naughty ones and the ones i've had to pay more attention to..
these few days i'm just taking many photos to remember this phase in my life.. i dunno if i'll ever be back there again.. but i'll really miss this place.. *sigh* hopefully i can come back to relief at least once a year during my years in uni..
hmm.. anyway.. talking abt uni.. haiz.. i got accepted into arts and pharmacy.. and i have to pick one.. really have to thank God.. but now i really dunno which course i should take.. should i go straight and study arts, or should i go do pharmacy first? guess in pharmacy there are lots of job prospects.. but is that what i really want to do? i dunno.. someone tell me!!!! i have to send in the reply soon!!
today i tried asking a few ppl.. and i dunno if i came across as like "bragging" to them that i got into uni.. cos they never really replied me.. but hey.. i really really need some advice!! aaaaaaaaaah!!

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