gonna post a short one just before i meet mark for lunch later. wooohoooo! carrie underwood! but i have to say, the show just now was quite crappy! i spent half of it raising my eyebrows at the tv.

the past few days have been quite eventful. there's been so much to think about. but it's been good, getting time off at home just reading the Word, praying.. spending extended time on the piano.. reading books and stuff. i really needed the break, and did i enjoy it!

well, on sunday, i went for the 100% rehearsal and hmm.. as i listened to the band play, i was dazzled by the music and couldn't help imagining what it would be like on that night itself. of course, what matters most in worship is not the music, but the heart. but as i watched the band members playing and singing their hearts out for God, i was touched. truly, this is what God desires of us.. our hearts fully submitted to Him. not just what we can do for Him.. but far more importantly, people who enthrone Him above all things and live their lives in obedience to Him. 1 Samuel 15:22. okay, i do admit i wanna be there on the 4th of June but josie.. don't start.

after the rehearsal, i had the most memorable karaoke session as far as i can remember, with the mt sinai people. huge room with a dance floor and disco ball.. sadly enough, it was not well utilised. the kids were amazingly cute. and the adults were at times appalled by our choice of song. heh. but it really was a night to remember.

other than that.. something that's been on my mind is furthering my studies in music. just spending extended time away concentrating on music alone. and not just secular music.. but also church music and music in worship. but one thing that i've been thinking about is how i can use this time away and what's gonna come out of it for His glory.. how i can serve Him better through the study of music. and if i can figure that out, i'm definitely going for it.

phew! CSI:SG is over! and to me, the day went pretty well. :) although at the start, i was slightly discouraged.. but as i sat at fort canning and saw groups come in and out.. and as i saw the people having fun.. some quite shack.. i felt happy! esp when i saw some of the quieter gals like tryphena, fransiska and shen faye opening up and mixing around with the others.. it was really heart warming. and thank God the weather was generally quite good and even in the rain, everyone was still having fun. so ends one day of activity.. and boy, am i shacked out.

sat in front of the tv watching formula one just now.. i haven't watched it in a long time, but today's the qualifying rounds for a very interesting race, the monaco grand prix. the circuit is quite different from the rest of the other circuits all round the world in that it's situated around buildings in the city, so there are quite alot of bends to wind around.. and there's this u-turn like bend. no joke. formula one racing ain't easy. you make one small mistake and it costs u seconds.. make a slightly bigger mistake and there goes your vehicle! kinda reminds me how the world works today. you really aren't given much leeway to make mistakes.. :s but it's also times like these that i'm thankful we have a God who is not only impartial, but loving.. such that He sent His son to die on the cross for us so that we may stand before Him righteous and pure. and many times, i have to remind myself not to take this grace for granted.

yesterday.. i read 1 peter about three times through.. and wow! 1 peter is a powerful book.. totally mind-blowing.. and everytime i read it i just felt this renewed sense of awe of how wonderful Christ is.. and also a sense of guilt cos we as His people are called to be holy.. but so often we fail.. but fail, we must, if not we'll never be able to appreciate God's grace!

uh.. okay i think i'm gonna stop here. feeling incoherent and not in the least spontaneous.

uh, my throat is very dry now. a result of prolonged singing and laughing last night. haha.. but it was fun! i was very reluctant to go at first as i was tired and feeling abit sick in the morning, but peiru and junwei managed to persuade me by showing me black faces and saying i broke my promise. sheesh! haha.. but somehow when you don't sing for a long time and then u go back and sing again, it gets very fun! especially when everyone sings together and no one starts creating nonsense scandals.

well.. besides going to chinatown at night, my afternoon was spent at potong pasir again.. conducting workshops on nutrition and common ailments. there was one rather knowledgable guy in my group who kept asking me very difficult-to-answer questions!! and sadly, also two compulsive smokers who kept wanting to go out and smoke. i tried to ask them to cut down bit by bit but they simply said "one day no cigarettes can die ah" and they even asked me to join them! !!!!!!! the people there are rather interesting and being there also stirred the desire in me to pray for them. one thing that touched me quite abit yday was when during the breaktime, this elderly man, whom they call the "old jukebox", was happily crooning "amazing grace" in chinese!

not to forget that after the sessions we had a short time of singing with them, which slowly morphed into karaoke. it started with me on the guitar and them wanting to sing "top of the world" and "peng you" and unfamiliar songs by teresa teng! and when i couldn't fulfil their desire to sing certain songs, the social worker put on a few karaoke vcds and then followed a karaoke session!

well, today's our final day there. i think i'll definitely miss my time spent there with everyone.

been in a reflective mood lately.. and many things have been on my mind. lots to think about after idmc and many issues have come up.
well, idmc has been really enriching.. two days have passed.. one more full day to go! so far everything said has encouraged me and challenged me to dig deeper in the Word, and not just read on a superficial level.
Biblical illiteracy, something that has been more prominent lately, especially among the second or third generation christians.. living in an instant society.. all we want are instant results without taking a step further to think things through. as a result, our very shallow knowledge and understanding of the Word is unable to bring us through times of trial.. or even times when we seek to share the gospel with our loved ones and friends. we don't even know how to extensively defend our faith with backing from the Word nowadays. and that's something so disturbing..


today, i was talking to my mum over lunch and she started complaining about my dad.. about the many things i've heard over and over again.. while my usual response was to shrug off all these complaints and carry on with whatever i was doing, it suddenly struck me and i voiced out my view that above it all, what he did not have while we did.. was God with us.. and as i told her that, my voice broke and at that moment i felt this immense pain of a daughter who sorely wanted her dad to share her faith.. to worship the same God she worshipped.. and throughout the day the feeling just hit me again and again.. at night when we were singing as we worship You and making a difference.. when i read 2 cor 4 again this morning.. i just felt it so strongly but along with that came feelings of helplessness and inadequacy.